Freedom From Bulimia Could Be Simpler Than YOU Thought.
Is your bulimia out of control?
Are you desperate to be free of the binging, purging and self-loathing?
Perhaps you’ve tried to stop before; maybe you’ve tried many times.
You’ve tried to figure out what is ‘wrong’ with you, monitored each morsel you eat and focused on identifying your triggers. You promise yourself that this will be the last time – but somehow it never is. Instead the urge becomes too strong and you give in. Then you beat yourself up for being so weak-willed and for failing – once again.
Bulimia is a dark time characterized by self-loathing, abusive internal dialogue and self-disgust. You feel lonely and alone. It is awful.
It’s a horrible place to be – I know, because I’ve been there.
However I was able to stop. And surprisingly I didn’t succeed through traditional methods. Instead I found something far easier yet way more effective – I simply shifted my thinking… and for over 20 years I have neither binged or purged or even thought about it.
Let me explain…
As you know, although bulimia is characterized by an obsession for food, it’s more complex than that.
You didn’t suddenly wake up one morning with bulimia. Instead it developed overtime. You see bulimia is a learnt behaviour, a behaviour that has been repeated over and over again. And anything repeated quickly becomes a habit that increasingly moves outside your conscious control. As time goes by the bulimic behaviours become entangled into a complex web of emotional associations and triggers forming a coping mechanism for all that goes wrong in your life.
The purging may have started out as a solution to a problem for when you over ate or broke a dietary rule. Perhaps you can remember the first time you did it, I know I can! On the one hand it didn’t make me feel that great however on the other hand I was so relieved that all that food had gone and I wouldn’t get fat. And perhaps like me you were convinced you’d never purge again, all that was required was a bit more self control and will power to stick to your diet.
Or maybe you had the idea that purging could be your ‘secret weapon’ for any time you broke a dietary rule or a neat little trick that would allow you to ‘have your cake and eat it’, whilst enabling you to maintain or loose weight?
However any sense of control you may feel over this soon slips away and unchecked, it’s not long before bulimia itself becomes the problem.
Is it your fault?
The answer is a resounding “no” – and you’ll see this when you get clear on what’s really going on.
Because here’s the thing… your brain is hardwired to help you survive.
And those powerful urges to binge and purge are part of your survival mechanism. They are happening to help protect you and keep you alive. In short your survival mechanism has no idea you’re on a diet or that food is plentiful. Instead it’s detecting your body is in a distressed state of hunger.
You can’t fool Mother Nature.
Your attempts to stick to a diet or under-eat in any way will have your brain send powerful messages that you receive has the urge to eat, over-eat or binge.
Many of the symptoms you are experiencing are the side effects of under-eating!
So put aside any notions that you are broken and need fixing.
Instead you need some self-compassion to treat yourself with the same kind of love, compassion and affection you’d extend to an injured animal or a sick child. You need to nourish and nurture your body and your mind.
By establishing regular eating patterns and giving your body the calories and nutrients it requires the urges to binge, first subside and then go away.
I know you probably fear food and are terrified that if you ate in that way you’d ‘go out of control’ and gain weight or get fat. But the thing is when you eat enough you do not ‘go out of control’ and eating can become a pleasurable experience and with time, all the nasty side effects of under-eating go away.
By becoming aware of your destructive internal dialogue, that is maintaining bulimia and have you feel bad about yourself and your body, you can encourage its focus to shift from what’s wrong and terrible, to what would bring you joy, love and happiness.
YOU have that power because we’re all born with authority over our own thinking and with practice you can direct your thinking in the direction you want it to go.
With new understanding comes change.
You see by changing your focus YOU change your reality…
Your experience of yourself and the world comes down to your values, your beliefs and your thoughts. These three components combine to serve as a powerful filter to help you make sense of your experiences in the world around you.
In short, values, thoughts and beliefs are self created – it means they might not actually be the truth! What’s more, because you created them, you can change them. You can do this by intentionally creating a different experience for yourself by focusing your attention elsewhere.
If you try to “cure” bulimia by identifying your triggers and:
- Working on strategies to mange, control or avoid them OR
- Trying to convince yourself to stop OR
- Find another way, another diet to control your intake
All you’ll do is place more emphasis and attention on the problem and keep it alive.
Here’s an example. If you tell a small child NOT to do something, invariably they do the very thing you’ve told them not to do. Why? Because before you AVOID doing something you have to think about doing it in the first place. Similarly if you tell yourself not to binge and purge, not only do you force yourself to think about it, you make it far more likely to occur.
Fortunately there is an alternative…
The only thing preventing you from recovering and feeling great about yourself and your body is your thinking.
I discovered that when I stopped focusing on the problem and trying to stop, my behaviours changed and the desire to binge and purge went away. For sure it didn’t happen overnight, but after years of trying, very soon I was bulimia free.
- Instead of thinking about not binging and purging and being thin or losing weight, I focused on being vibrant, healthy and toned which meant eating regularly giving my body, my mind and my soul the nourishment it needed.
- Instead of thinking that I wasn’t good enough. I learnt to soften my internal dialogue and direct my thinking.
- Instead of being swamped in the sadness and self-depreciation that came with being a bulimic I made happiness a habit. I started to occupy my mind with things I enjoyed and did things that made me happy.
As a result I developed my self-esteem and confidence and I focused on what was good about myself instead of hating the reflection in the mirror.
And it worked.
And it could work for you too.
So if some of what I’ve said in this article has resonated with you, let me share some more…
I’ve created a free video series for people like you who want to be bulimia free.
All you have to do right now is simply add your email to the sign-up box at the top of this page. In return you’ll receive my series of informative videos where you’ll discover how to stop bulimia and start living the life you love.
So please join me now and start your journey to bulimia freedom.
Bulimia Recovery Coach
Julie won a 15 year battle with bulimia over 30 years ago and now mentors and coaches others to bulimia freedom.
In the wider world Julie is known as a bulimia recovery coach however, to her clients she is known as The Recovery Alchemist, who brings a unique and powerful perspective on recovery that has helped people from all walks of life, not just stop bingeing and purging but learn how to love themselves and their bodies and create a life they love.
Click here to discover how Julie could help you “Break Free & Stay Free”.
Very helpful reading, thanks for sharing your experience and helping to believe there’s still hope.